natural instinct

written much earlier | just cleaning out the drafts drawer

Waking up this morning wasn't my usual issue this morning. Instead, it was not being able to sleep. I have friends who give in and actually get out of bed at the earliest times like four or five thirty in the morning. I stopped sleeping around this time but I was stubborn and instead of being mature and just getting up, I tossed back and forth and perseverated on the fact that I was not sleeping. When I finally did have to get up to get the house moving, popping into each girl's room for an extra five minutes of sleep in each of their beds before really ripping the bandaid off, I noticed that I had a new ache in my back. I then went downstairs and took my blood pressure, which has suddenly gone from incredibly low my whole life to 145/95. I took it again, this time I pulled up pictures of cute baby animals. -- same numbers. I've started tracking this, making a point to take it when I first get up, pre any contributing factors like medication or caffeine. My husband seems unbothered by this new concern. I told him that it would be really embarrassing (for him) if I have a heart attack given that is his primary role in life -- to stay on top of heart health, especially in his own family . Each of the girls rambled off their blood pressure numbers, Ella gleaming over her 104/60, which was closer to my old numbers). As I got my stuff on to take Ella to school, I struggled to get over far enough to put on my sock, having to sit in order to successfully perform this trite act. I got up, internally grumbling and walked to let the dog out. Each stood from their beds and went into a natural, fantastic stretch before they moved. Why do dogs have so much more common sense than me.